17 Apr Calming Down. Techniques that help- Elizabeth Lehmann
Elizabeth Lehmann, a collegue of mine in New York City has created an audio program that has helped many people to become more resilient. Her program is a series of audios that give simple, quick practices to help build resilience. Elizabeth wrote the following post after hearing from a friend she supported who got distressed.
A distraught friend of mine called me, reaching out for help, saying he didn’t know what was wrong with him. He felt really agitated and hadn’t been able to sleep at all the night before. “Would you be open to me guiding you through some short physical calming techniques?’, I asked. He said “sure”. What I offered him is part of the “Resilient-You” audio program.
I asked him what he was experiencing in his body and he said there was a lot of tension. First we did physical calming technique #1, “Wanna Hold Your Hand”. I asked him how he was feeling afterwards and he said “Wow! I’m definitely feeling a difference!”.
Then we did technique #2, “Every Breath You Take”, after which he reported with amazement in his voice, “I’m feeling even calmer!”, although he let me know there was still tightness in his chest.
So I suggested he put one hand on his chest area and the other hand on his solar plexus, the area just above his belly, as I guide people to do in technique #6, “Feel Of Your Touch”. He reported “Oh My God! I feel like I’m gonna cry.” “That’s totally natural”, I replied. It’s one of your nervous system’s ways of releasing highly charged energy and rebalancing itself. So, if it feels OK to do so, welcome it and allow yourself to go ahead and cry”, which he did. Moments later he excitedly proclaimed “I can finally breathe! It’s like I’ve been holding my breath without even realizing it. But now I can freely breathe”.
I then asked him if he was aware of any feelings he’d been having. He immediately blurted out “YES! I’ve been feeling really angry at my mother and feeling suffocated by her!”. I know his mother; she’s a highly demanding prima donna. Moving his parents close to him, assuming responsibility for taking care of them in their old age, he’s been around his self-absorbed mother in the last year and a half more than in the last several decades of his life, combined. So I said “yeah, this all makes sense. The intense agitating feelings got stuck in your body.”
I checked with him the next day, and he said he was feeling much better. He’d actually been able to sleep the night before. This is just one example of how what’s offered on the audio program can be effectively used.
To hear a podcast I did with Elizabeth where she guides us through a couple of practices click here.