12 Mar Trigger Warning?
The class was full despite it being a hot muggy summer day.
There wasn’t any air conditioning cooling down a packed class of adult psychology students.
Maybe the heat contributed to a teacher-student disagreement?
I can’t even remember what the upset was all about …
What I do remember is a number of students accusing the teacher of triggering them.
They were saying the prof “should” have sent out a trigger warning so students could choose whether to come to class or not.
???
Have you also noticed a surge in “trigger warnings?”
Which brings up an extraordinary consideration.
Are we too fragile? Is there a fear that we can’t handle what happens in life?
Are we overprotecting ourselves, and others? Perhaps not but if we are, is there another way?
Problem is (we all know this) life has a way of disrupting our lives.
What would allow us to withstand the disruptions of life, big and small?
Or … might it be possible to cultivate inner scaffolding so we can be with life, no matter what happens?
Now, granted during our healing process, there are multiple times we can and will get triggered, sometimes intensely.
We’ve all heard the saying, “life isn’t a bowl of cherries.” That strikes me as dismissive and missing the larger point …
… WHO do we want to BE when we get disrupted?
Do we want to hold on tightly to the survival strategies that kept us safe throughout our lives?
Is it possible to grow our capacity to BE with what happens?
In one of the ancient Buddhist texts there is a phrase, “take the blow.”
I know. That sounds terrible, conjuring up all kinds of horrid thoughts.
Let’s parse it down.
Life happens.
Whether we want it to or not.
We do what we can to keep ourselves and our loved ones safe.
And there are things we won’t be able to avoid. Suffering … including the intense suffering that so many are in, whether they want to be or not. Death. Sickness. Unexpected betrayals. Disasters (relationally and environmentally).
Personally, I don’t want you (or me!) to suffer. I don’t want pain to be part of life’s equation.
But it is.
Wouldn’t it be better to choose HOW we want to BE with what happens?
That’s been the focus of my personal and professional work all these many decades.
I’ve seen that withdrawing or reacting in old ways hasn’t worked.
What has worked, with me and those I work with, is not just dealing with the painful history someone carries but cultivating empowering ways to be with what happens, while honoring what has happened, leading the way to this moment.
Building a solid, secure, steady inner self … in the face of shame, anxiety, dissociation … for ourselves and the younger generation.