08 Jun Mistakes Arise as Wisdom
A few years ago, when I was still “washing the gray right out of my hair” I had my head haloed in hair dye when I saw an email from Sharon, one of our veteran Becoming Safely Embodied mentors telling me course participants were waiting for me to join a BSE coaching call.
My eyes almost popped out of my head. Oh dear!
I had added the call incorrectly into my calendar for 6pm. They were there 2 hours earlier. How did I miss this?
I could sense my history ringing those old alarm bells. I was sure I had done “something wrong.” Parts of me were sitting up waiting to be made wrong.
You know what? Something else happened.
This group, while I wasn’t there to coach them, decided to meet, checking in with each other in a way that demonstrated, yet again, how a supportive and healing community works.
Because of our years together, one of the members acknowledged it’s because of the safe container we’ve created together that our various groups can operate without me in a pinch, generating space for everyone to be seen, valued, acknowledged.
In that kind of space healing happens.
And it’s not dependent on one person.
If we look at it from the Parallel Lives model from the BSE —
In my history, mistakes were ripe territory to be shamed, ridiculed … the felt sense was they were to be remembered forever as a character flaw.
Years of healing showed me a different perspective.
Mistakes are evolutionarily designed to help us grow, develop and flourish.
Mistakes are designed to point us in a different direction.
It’s one thing to “understand” this — another thing to have life plop you right into a “mistake” like me not being on the coaching call at the same time as the group.
If I had stayed in my historical perspective (mistakes are shameful, wrong, bad…) I would never had received the gift I had.
Years of practice allowed me to enter that group, very late, apologize, be transparent, and be graced with the goodness of witnessing these amazing people be leaders in the healing of themselves and the group around them, including me.
As one of the members, Marcy, said, “We’re SuperWomen in our Clark Kent disguises.”
My heart blew open.
You can find a video I made on this topic, a fan favorite, at this link:
Mistakes Arise as Wisdom
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