Tag Archives: trauma

Shame is a developmental wound

Below is an excerpt from my book coming out in January, 2017 from Norton Publishing. To attend a day long workshop @Brattleboro Retreat September 23 click here ”Those god-awful moments of shame take over in a nanosecond. Anyone who has had the experience of shame can recall the acute experience, the physiological horror of wanting […]

As easy as learning to ride a bike? It takes learning, unlearning, relearning over and over

Learning to ride a backwards bike takes time to unlearn the neurobiological biases already wired.  Then shift and ride a normal bike there’s another learning undoing that has to happen. It’s also true with the healing process. Our perceptual lens has us experience the world from our Internal Working Model. We think we’re stuck, doomed […]

How You Become You

  How do we become who we are? The question has percolated in me for over thirty years as I’ve explored this subject.  Joseph Campbell was famous for talking about how the acorn is programmed and designed to become an oak tree. How do I become fully me?  Authentic, genuine, safe in my body and […]

Healing the Missing Link

Over the past years I’ve stumbled, almost by accident, across a missing ingredient in healing trauma and attachment wounding. Underneath the trauma reactivity and physiological arousal, underneath  repairing the attachment wounds, there’s a doorway into building a positive self-structure. As therapists we tend to overlook this, bypassing it, focusing more on the obviously distracting physiological […]

It was these that whispered Metta to me

It was these that whispered Metta to me

(photo I took in Pompeii of an angel frescoed into eternity)   One of the people in the Embodied Practices sent me the following note and wasn’t sure that it was “suitable for the blog.”  After reading it I was certain it was! I found her experience to be moving and compelling.  With her permission I […]

Six Sides of the Breath

When people have had a difficult life they get used to shortening and contracting their breath. The breath can get tangled up in the whole slew of thoughts and feelings and reactions to others that are going on almost constantly. It can be hard to turn the attention inside to notice the breath – right […]

How to Pattern-Interruptus

Maybe it’s the day?  Maybe it’s because I have the Becoming Safely Attached curriculum on my mind but all week I have been interacting with people about the patterns that dictate the course of their lives. In fact, I literally just got off the phone.  A wonderful, delightful, engaging woman called wanting to find out […]

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